LIST OF REASONS GOKOU SUCKS (IN STORY FORM)
by Griever
Summary: I don't like Gokou... find out why


LIST OF REASONS THAT GOKOU SUCKS (IN STORY FORM)  
  
  
Note: Oh man, I've done this so many time before, I'm actually getting pretty good at  
it. Anyway, for those who haven't read any of my other Gokou abshing fics, I hate  
Gokou with all my heart and soul. He has such an incredibly annoying and happy  
attitude toward other people's pain. Bashing him brings joy to my blackened, cold  
heart. So, enjoy the story. I hope you all come out of it with a sense of justice for all  
the crap gokou put his buds through. I don't know why everyone likes him so much  
anyway. Vegeta and Kurrin are the only good characters on that show anyway.  
  
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For the longest time, the heores of DragonballZ had been fighting for peace on their  
home world, protecting each other and the other people of Earth from harm. They  
had fought off the greatest of foes, of adversaries. But they didn't all get along. I  
mean, Piccolo was a jerk, Vegeta was a bigger jerk, Kurrin was holding the team by  
himself, Gohan had no friends, no one cared that much about the Androids, and  
Gokou. Oh, Gokou. I cannot even begin to describe him. But I'll try.  
  
Gokou, who had been the worst thing to happen to Earth since the Black Plague was  
around, a disease I'm positive none of you ever suffered from, had been a pain in  
Earth's side since he was born. He killed people, killed morepeople, destroyed  
property, and so forth.  
  
Okay, I'm done explaining about the characters. Actually, now that I think of it,  
anyone reading this story must know who the characters are anyhow, because in  
retrospect, they would be watching the show right? Or why else would they be here?  
  
#############################################  
  
Gokou was struggling. Never had he had a tougher enemy to defeat. He attacked with  
all his force. Kamehameha, Genki Dama, you get the idea. He just couldn't win.  
  
"Pull, Gokou," reminded Kurrin, who was sitting quietly at the table.  
  
"Oh. Thanks, Kurrin!" smiled Gokou as he pulled the refrigerator door open. He  
laughed maniacally. "Ha! You have at last been defeated!!" He grabbed a soda from  
the shelf on the inside and went to sit next to Kurrin.  
  
"Kurrin..."  
  
"Twist the cap to the right."  
  
"Oh. Thanks!"  
  
Gokou looked around the room. "Hey, where do you think Chi-chi and Gohan are?"  
  
Kurrin looked annoyingly at Gokou. "Gohan is training in the mountains with  
Piccolo. Chi-chi said she was going to Vegeta's to get some... thing. Of course, that  
was at least an hour ago."  
  
"Hmmm..... she must have run into one of her friends on the way to Vegeta's."  
  
"Yes... I'm sure that's the reason."  
  
Suddenly, to the surprise of the two warriors, Trunks burst in. "Gokou!! Kurrin!!  
Come quickly!! There is major trouble in South City!! An evil monster that talks  
tough and is stronger than even all our warriors put together has come from a distant  
planet with a grudge against something!!"  
  
"Well that's new," noted Gokou.  
  
*************************************************************  
  
Soon, the two Saiyajins and Kurrin had flown over to South City. The people  
cheered.  
  
"Hey! Gokou's come to save us!"  
  
"Yeah! uh, Gokou!"  
  
"Yeah he's okay!"  
  
"Wait. Didn't he let us all die once or twice?"  
  
"Ummm... yeah. Hey, wait, he did!!"  
  
"Damn you, Gokou!!"  
  
"Go to hell, you sonofabitch!!"  
  
"Listen to the people cheer for me," smiled Gokou as they continued toward the  
enemy.  
  
The three landed in front of the villain. "What do want on Earth?!" screamed Gokou  
in question.  
  
"I'll tell you. But first, I'll explain my long and boring origin to you. I was an artificial  
drone created by a mad scientist to destroy things, until I killed him and started  
working for an evil alien crime boss who died in a vicious battle, plus, I like turning  
people into cakes!!"  
  
"Okay. Right."  
  
The villain charged Gokou, gave him a shot to the ribs, then hurled him into the air.  
He beat Gokou savagely. "now I'll waste time before killing you!!!!"  
  
"Kaioken times a google!!" screamed Gokou in a fury of rage. He beat the pulp out of  
the alien and threw him to the ground.  
  
"Now, leave this planet, and never kill anyone again," Gokou commanded the  
stranger.  
  
"Sure. I promise," replied the villain, crossing his fingers. Of course, Gokou is too  
stupid to notice this. As the Saiyajin turns his back, the villain fires a beam of energy  
at Gokou. Luckily, Gokou turns around and sees this, turning the blast on its creator.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"  
  
Gokou smiles and waves to the crowd, which in turn throws empty beer cans and  
rocks at him.  
  
"Hmm... that's odd..."  
  
"Come on, Gokou," urged Kurrin, "let's go home."  
  
(((((((((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))  
  
Later, at home....  
  
Chi-chi walked in to the house with ruffled hair and her bra hanging out of her  
grocery bag.  
  
"So, did you get what you needed from Vegeta?" asked Gokou stupidly.  
  
"Oh yea," replied Chi-chi, "I got EVERYTHING I needed."  
  
"Well that's good," Gokou replied.  
  
Kurrin got a tremendous sweatdrop.  
  
"I think I'll go upstairs and take a long shower," Chi-chi remarked, setting the  
groceries on the counter and sticking her bra in her pocket.  
  
"Okay. Me and Kurrin will be right here."  
  
"Dammit, Gokou. You may be the strongest man in the world, but you sure as hell  
ain't the smartest."  
  
"Hey!! Hey??"  
  
What an idiot  
  
Gohan and Piccolo entered through the door.  
  
"Gohan! How's my favorite son?"  
  
"Okay, dad. I just got a--"  
  
"Hey, that's great. now get the hell out of here. I'm playing go fish."  
  
"Poker."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"I was wondering why you gave me all those threes," said Kurrin.  
  
Piccolo sat down. "Anyone want to know what I think the definition of bondage' is?"  
  
"NO," said everyone else.  
  
"You have any spicy chicken wings?"  
  
"No. We don-- OHMYGOD!!!! WE DON'T! EMERGENCY, KURRIN!! LET'S  
HURRY TO THE STORE, PRONTO!!!!"  
  
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ 


End file.
